MY BIG CHOP
Thursday the 1st of October 2015, I decided to do the big chop. Having been nervous the whole day, I suddenly felt restless that the bus was running 10 minutes late and that traffic was moving unusually slow. I couldn’t get to the the hair salon fast enough. I could see the look of shock on my hair dressers face when I asked for my hair to be chopped off.
She began with a sharp pair of scissors to cut of the parts of my hair which were longer, before bringing out the shaver to even everything out. It felt like a weight was being lifted off my conscious as she cut off my dead damaged hair, left weak after years of harsh heat, tight weaves and worst of the lot; chemical relaxers aka The Creamy Crack.
As she snipped and shaved it all away, I felt that it wasn’t just my hair being cut off. She was cutting off years of low self esteem and shame about my natural hair texture. She was cutting off negative and dangerous ideals from my mind about what it meant to be be beautiful. Ideals like ‘longer, straighter, wavier and lighter’ where somehow more beautiful. I realised something in that moment; the negative feelings I had about my hair, and have had since I was a young girl, had had an astoundingly damaging effect on how I perceived my ‘blackness’.
I started to wonder, how many other young black women grew up with feelings of low self-worth because the world around them told them everyday that their natural selves were not beautiful, and how many older black women are still haunted with negative notions about who they are? This I why I have decided to finally commit to Le Noir Chic having created the blog almost a year ago.
This is the beginning of not just my natural hair journey, but my journey of self-acceptance and I invite you to start your own.
This blog will be a safe space for black women to learn, to grow, to share their experiences.
Welcome aboard my sisters.
Le Noir Chic Editor.
Aura B Verene